Hello, dear readers! It’s your favorite columnist back again—by some miracle of caffeine and calendar reminders. If consistency were a stat in gaming, I’d be permanently stuck at Level 1 with zero XP. But hey, I remembered to show up this week, which already feels like unlocking an achievement: [Persistent Presence: Log in after 27 failed attempts].
Now, I know you’re here for the free games, not for me to spiral into an existential crisis about my scheduling skills. So, without further ado, here’s what the Epic Games Store has blessed us with this week.
Free Epic Games of the Week
This week, the Epic Games Store is doling out two gems: Castlevania Anniversary Collection and Snakebird Complete. These games might not be playable on the cloud, but don’t let that stop you—they’re still worth every byte of hard drive space (and the considerable emotional rollercoaster they bring).
First up, Castlevania Anniversary Collection—a celebration of classic side-scrolling platforming goodness. Eight games in total… one epic Belmont family saga, and enough whip-cracking action to make Indiana Jones jealous. This is a cornerstone of gaming history, folks. Plus, nothing says “holiday vibes” like pixelated vampires and gothic soundtracks. It’s like A Christmas Carol, but if Scrooge were Dracula.
Then we have Snakebird Complete, which is what happens when you mix vibrant graphics, adorable snakebird hybrids, and a puzzle difficulty curve designed by a team of sadistic geniuses. It’s cute! It’s clever! It’s also the reason I’ve been yelling “WHY DOES THIS BIRD EVEN NEED FRUIT?!” at my screen for hours. Whether you’re into problem-solving or just want a game that mocks your spatial reasoning skills, this one’s for you.
FINAL THOUGHTS (OR LACK THEREOF)
So, there you have it—two free games, yours for the taking until November 21rd. Just mosey on over to the Epic Games Store and claim them before you inevitably forget, like I almost forgot to write this article. (Shoutout to my editor for the terrifyingly specific “friendly reminders.”)
These games are cloud compatible on at least airgpu and Shadow, and they’re the perfect escape from adulting. Why face your inbox or clean your apartment when you can slay vampires or turn your brain into a pretzel trying to navigate snakebird chaos?
As for me? I’ll be back next week—or in three weeks, depending on how many Snakebird puzzles break me. Until then, enjoy your freebies, and remember: If you don’t grab these games now, future you will absolutely judge you harder than I judge my own life choices.
